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A cryptocurrency for human beings

Requiring computers and software and electricity is a flaw shared by all other crypto currencies.

NoCoin represents a paradigm shift. NoCoin runs on the collective conciousness of its users.

Rather than wasting resources and contributing to global warming like so called “Proof-of-Work” coins or rewarding early investors at the expense of late comers like the glorified pyramid scheme that is “Proof-of-Stake” NoCoin is different. NoCoin remembers when “the rich get richer…” was said with disdain.

Most cryptocurrencies are simply used as an intermediary for other currencies. This leads to their primary use being speculation that the price will go up. Coins are backed by other coins, complex frauds run for years on end printing this and burning that. Jesus flipped tables for less.

NoCoin seeks to create a new era of fake internet money. A coin that disincentivizes greedy speculation and hoarding. It eschews flawed notions like consensus, proof, work, and value. Artificial scarcity is a crime not a feature. Complex “wallet” software and “keys” and “seed phrases” are not the future of money. They aren’t even the past of money, they’re a horrible teenage phase some people are caught up in.

NoCoin are created by thinking, and transferred like any other thought. You can transfer them via text message, email, phone call, post card, graffiti mural. Whatever.

In fact, heres 1,000 NoCoin to you, the reader.

|      ₦1,000     |
|   One Thousand  |
|      NoCoin     |

NoCoin Facts

A Comparison of Bitcoin and NoCoin



Requires complex wallet software

Requires no specialized software.

Fees vary and are too expensive for small transfers

No fees. NoCoin costs nothing at all to transfer

Expensive network uses more and more energy while our planet burns

Uses human thought, powered by belief. Requires no extra energy.

7 transactions a second max with no increased throughput no matter how much energy is thrown at the problem

Transactions need only be secured by the parties involved. Theoretical limit increases with each user.

Immutable database means no reversible transactions including in cases of proven theft/fraud

Transactions are easily reversed by deciding that the transaction didn’t happen

Getting in/out of an exchange can be difficult and requires handing identifying information to shady characters

No exchange necessary. NoCoin can be created by users with a mere thought.

The #1 choice of ransomware gangs and cyber criminals

Never once used in a ransomware attack

Limited supply incentives users to hodl. Tokenomics leads to ever shrinking number of whales who hold the majority of coins.

Limitless supply encourages spending. Whales can be liquidated by a collective decision that they have no money.

Complex cryptographic keys are required to prove access to coins

Word is bond, they are your NoCoin if you say so.

Public ledger horrible for privacy, your transactions are literally public you morons

Each user is responsible for maintaining their own ledger in whatever form they wish, including just remembering it. The only people who know about your transaction are the parties involved

Created by brute force on specially made hardware that serves no other purpose made of rare earth minerals that are in many cases mined by literal children, in buildings full of future e-waste that are literally burning the future generations world to enrich a bunch of people who don’t do any meaningful work and contribute nothing to society but misery.

Elegantly generated on a machine made by god herself mostly out of water in buildings such as homes or work places, bars or restaurants, or even the great outdoors. No impact on the environment. Disincentivize greedy people from using it, so no jerks allowed.

Has a stupid special symbol cannot be represented in normal text

Reuses ₦ Naira symbol. Because thats the 2nd of the 3 Rs

Dangerous and volatile, requires research before investing

Incredibly stable, worth what you decide. Research is not necessary. It runs on thoughts and can be modified by thoughts. It works how you think it will.

“Trustless” system only useful for dealing with untrustworthy people

“Trusting” system. You’re good for it and so am I.

Elon Musk tweets about it

Elon Musk has never heard of it

Code is law

Law is Law

Be your own bank

Banks are entirely unnecessary


Literally can’t be lost only forgotten.

Q: Where do I buy NoCoin?

A: They are not (currently) listed on any exchange but you already have 1k to get you started. And you can simply decide you have more should you need more.

Q: What about double spending?

A: Reduce Reuse Recycle. NoCoin can be spent any number of times. This is good for NoCoin.

Q: But doesn't that make it worthless?

A: NoCoin is worth whatever you and the other party agree it is worth. This is how all financial instruments work so who cares? The alleged value of bitcoin has only brought scammers and bullshit. I recommend you keep NoCoin worth very little. Use it to buy a cigarette off a friend or pay them back for a game of pinball.

Q: How is NoCoin better than fiat?

A: Same way bitcoin is.

Q: Help I lost all my money trading NoCoin?

A: No you didn't

Q: How is this a crypto currency? There isn't any cryptography

A: It is better than traditional crypto currencies which use cryptography as a way to convince people who do not understand technology that there is value to magic internet tokens. Cryptography is itself incredibly useful. Cryptography for cryptography's sake is a homework assignment.

Q: I don't think you understand crypto currency...

A: I understand it far better than the average person who holds it. Crypto currency is a great form of gambling, or extracting money from the gullible. It has other use cases (like crime) but those all rely on the inherent ability to dump your coins on the gullible. A computer network wasted CPU cycles. You decided that that makes their output worth the CPU cycles. I waste mental energy and decided that makes NoCoin worth the mental energy. Given that mental energy is far more sustainable and scalable I consider my method superior.

Q: But this is stupid and it doesn't solve any problems you are just imagining that something that doesn't even exist is somehow willed into existence because you say so! No one will accept this as a currency. You are a moron.

A: All other crypto currencies run on magical thinking just with an abstraction layer of silicon and electricity. They’re C++ and NoCoin is the machine code they compile into.

Q: But how will the coin moon?

A: Get a job you degenerate

Q: Have fun staying poor!

A: Literally no rich person has ever uttered this in the history of rich people. You are fool, a fool in a mans shoes


If you are deemed worthy I will respond via email.

Special Thanks to Alexander Ivanov for the CSS redesign